Women have been trying to remake men for, well, forever.
I recall reading Cosmo back in the 80’s. Every issue, in one shape or form or another, contained an article which, when you boiled it down, contained advice on how to change your boyfriend or husband into doing things or being somebody they weren’t.
After reading that article, if you were so inclined, you could pick up Psychology Today, where you would often find an article talking about how toxic relationships became when one person tried to “change” the other.
One wonders how many divorces occurred because of those Cosmo articles.
Another thing that somebody pointed out to me back then — flip on any soap opera. You’ll be treated to a parade of men, few of who behave the way men actually DO, when confronted with infidelity, for example. What they do is behave they way women WANT them to behave in such situations.
Again, one wonders how many women spent their lives disappointed because men behaved like men, rather than behaving like soap opera stars.
Two final thoughts:
- There is a false dichotomy being presented. Being a “tough guy” does not mean that a man cannot be (list of things you want men to be like). The real question is if that list of things is realistic or not. (This is not an area where women are good at being realistic).
- Maybe part of the solution, if indeed these differences between men and women are a problem (I am not convinced they are), is that women become LESS vulnerable, LESS compassionate, and the like. Think about that for a moment. I suspect every person, male or female, knows at least one woman who was so vulnerable and so compassionate that they were nonfunctional in the world.
Balance, in all things, is the goal. Men are not women and women are not men. And what fucking boring world it would be if they were or we were.