In social settings, ask everyone what they do for a living. Regardless of gender. Regardless of appearance.
How about we don’t ask anyone, instead? Just lose the question altogether?
In my view, the hubby-bro-whatdoyoudoforaliving question comes from the fact that men don’t have much to talk about besides what they do and sports.
Proof? When you’re in that social situation, notice that once the man states what he does, and the reverse question is then asked and answered, the men immediately go on to something else, except in that rare circumstance when they are doing almost exactly the same thing.
Conclusion? The men really don’t give a shit what the other one does. And if they start asking us what we do, they don’t give a shit about us, either. And the reason why you weren’t asking the men what they did for a living? Because you don’t give a shit about what they do. (Not trying to be rude, just stating a fact.)
Women talk about more interesting things (sometimes, not always). Interpersonal relationships. Families. Parents. Babies. Children. What we like to do. Charity or volunteer work. Stuff that matters to humanity. Go to any graveyard, you’ll see all sorts of monuments that include “Loving Mother” or “Loving Father”, but very few that mention what anyone did for a living.
And, if “equality” means that we have to forgo important, human topics of discussion because that’s not what men talk about, and instead talk about “what we do” and football……..then we’re back to letting them control us again. Just in a different way.